I hear a lot of “failure” talk in my coaching business. Women will come to me after another failed attempt to lose weight. Another failed attempt to stick to a diet. Another failed attempt to strike work-life balance.
Which got me thinking about the concept of success and failure, and the clinical way in which we set goals and expectations for ourselves.
And I’ve realized that we’re going about it all wrong. It’s not the women that are failing, it’s the process they’re taking.
You see, the standard way to set a goal is to think of a desired outcome (rather intellectually) and then take specific actions to get there. While being smart about goal setting is important, there’s a downside to being too strategic about the whole thing.
When we think too far ahead, and have a laser focus on how we’re going to achieve something in the future, we’re overlooking one of the most important aspects of success. That is: Will I enjoy the journey of reaching this goal?
If the answer is no, then you don’t have a hope of success.
Because successfully reaching a goal isn’t just about the outcome, it’s about enjoying the process that gets you there.
The key to staying motivated is to find joy in the journey. I don’t know about you, but counting calories, eliminating food groups or doing exercise classes that I hate is not going to motivate me to follow through on my health and fitness goals. If anything, it’s a one way street to failure.
But that’s the way we go about this whole goal-setting thing – we make choices that look good on paper. It’s intellectual, but it’s not effective. And ladies, that’s what makes the diet industry a billion dollar business.
So What Can You Do Differently?
Instead of thinking about something you’d like to achieve and immediately asking how do I get there, start by asking why.
Why do I want to get to reach that goal?
Why do I want to make that change?
Why does this really matter to me?
Only after you’ve found your why, should you start on the how, which should be created in a way that’s realistic, sustainable and (most importantly) enjoyable.
Remember this: Goals aren’t reached overnight. Life is in the journey. Start with why. Build your own how.
Now I’d Love To Hear From You
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