My groundbreaking cellulite program

Cure for cellulite

My groundbreaking cellulite program

Back in 2013, I came up with my million dollar business idea — the ultimate cure for cellulite.

Compared to other sub-par cellulite programs on the market this one WOULD help women rid themselves of lumps and bumps forever, through a carefully curated, foolproof routine. It would be the ultimate cellulite solution.

The inspiration for this program came not long after I discovered my first derrière dimples at the tender age of 24. As I’ve written about before, this realization was soul crushing

However, as a pragmatic Taurean, I was buoyed in thinking that I could create a solution for millions of women around the world; this would no longer be a like it or lump it situation, I knew I could figure it out.

Fast forward three weeks: I was sitting at my dining room table, with hand-scrawled theories written on loose leaf paper strewn all around, and wondering why I hadn’t yet cracked the code for smooth, supple skin.

Following advice that I had found on the internet and read in books, I had:

  • Avoided crossing my legs for three weeks
  • Kept my feet elevated at night to reverse blood flow
  • Stopped eating chicken skin AND cottage cheese
  • Exercised my thighs with hundreds of teeny-tiny little pulses (thanks, but not really, Tracy Anderson)
  • Spent a medically unadvised amount of time in saunas and heated rooms to sweat out the toxins that contributed to my shameful cellulite
  • Dry body brushed on a daily basis: sweeping upwards on the thighs and downwards on the glutes
  • Popped collagen supplements and steered clear of any food that would further break down my skin’s apparently delicate structure
  • And I even spent $99 purchasing a “personalized cellulite removal schedule” that contained eight cellulite reversal exercises. You read that right, $99 for eight, one-move exercises.

But even with all of these interventions, one month later the little buggers were still there.

Ultimately, spending hours each day researching what I had to do to “look better” wasn’t a practical use of my time or my limited finances. As it turns out, weight loss trial and error is both time-consuming AND expensive.

So I archived my research and got back to real life. Eating chicken skin, crossing my legs and exercising in a way that made my entire body feel good.

As it turns out, while I’m still acquainted with my fair share of dimples (as is 90% of the female population), living a healthy, un-obsessed lifestyle did more for toning body than any “groundbreaking” cellulite program could.

Last week I invited you to join me in taking this year one day at a time.

Today I offer up another 2018 wellness proposal: be willing to follow through with sustainable, daily health and lifestyle practices, and stay committed to adopting an attitude of self-love. These two habits will do more for the look, feel and longevity of your body than any flash-in-the-pan fitness and diet plan ever could.

 

Have a beautiful day (and remember to not get bogged down in the details).

 

With love,

 

P.S. Just in case you’re wondering if I concocted this whole cellulite story…here’s a screenshot of my anti-cellulite research:

 

How to get rid of cellulite

 

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